How I Almost Got Catfished


Hey guys! So, I was honestly undecided as to what I would use as my header for today’s post since it all happened so fast. I didn’t know whether to use this
or nahSince I was on the verge of getting catfished but Jesus had my back.
Or whether to use this
hold itSince this babe thought she was fooling me when in actuality, I caught on quite fast and she was just fooling herself.

Either ways, I’m still laughing at it, and I’m just glad I had people to help me out with the deceit I was going through yesterday night. Before I go start telling you this simple story, let’s have a flashback and look at how I ACTUALLY got catfished. Yeah, you can laugh all you want at that, but that was the past me. Current me has Jesus now, and I’m smarter than that, so please, hold your negativity. I’ve told you, 2015 is my year of positivity.

How I (Almost) Got Catfished

So yesterday, I was just minding my business, watching TV and tweeting when this chick I was talking to in school finally texted me. I was trying to spit game to her and she seemed to be semi interested. I gave her my number, but since my phone was dead, there was no way I could make her call my phone so I could have her number.
Sidenote: Fellas, if a lady ever gives you her number, call it in her presence. There and then a phone must ring in her pocket. You don’t want to waste time calling a random man in Milwaukee. I’m talking from experience here.
Anyways, that was two days ago. Her text landed on my phone, but I had no idea who it was. But once she told me her name, I was likeYeaaaaaaWe chatted some more and then I remembered that this chick told me that she was good artistically. Now when it comes to art (with the exclusion of anything that deals with writing/words) I’m definitely handicapped. If y’all don’t know, I suck at drawing. I am a terrible artist. I can’t even draw stick figures well without the stick’s body and head being out of proportion.
Anyways! As we were texting, I asked her about her paintings and whether I could see one yunno. I just wanted to see how good she was. She told me she wasn’t that good, but she was willing to share her art with me. So she showed me this
wp_ss_20150420_0001As you can see, I stunned. Like, I couldn’t believe it. That looked like the work of someone who’s to pro to be unknown. I was honestly about to give her a motivational speech on how she has talent and should think of marketing her products and stuff when something caught my eye. Her painting had a signature on it. That’s not unusual since I know artists do that. It was just that…the name looked nothing like hers. I zoomed in on the picture to get a glimpse of how she signs her paintings and saw thiswp_ss_20150420_0002Leanid Alremov. Or at least, that’s what my eyes deduced. I found that a bit odd. Not odd that she might be using a pseudonym on her works (artists are weird people). It’s just that, usually, when people use pseudonyms (at least, the authors/artists I know) the fake name doesn’t go too far away. Like J.K. Rowling calling herself Robert Galbraith. Or Ed McBain calling himself Curt Cannon. Or John Banville calling himself Benjamin Black.
Now, see, those names don’t sound too far off.
But her name’s Madeline. Maddy for short. I don’t see Leanid Alremov anywhere near her name. So I investigated wp_ss_20150420_0003(Ignoring that Bing is my search engine) Lo and behold the original artist was found. Leonid Afremov.
He had a whole art gallery of his paintings and stuff.
wp_ss_20150420_0004Yet here this babe was, claiming it was her artwork.
This was me after finding this outconfusedWhat exactly was the essence of lying? I kinda didn’t understand. I was now at crossroads. Should I be a fool, and ask her whether she’s Leonid Afremov or call her a liar and thief?

I did what any good morally upright human being would do…CDFSKxnUsAAFoWoI played along. So, after little convincing, she showed me another one of “her” oil paintingswp_ss_20150420_0006Pretty innit? So I thought. I zoomed in on the picturewp_ss_20150420_0007Sadly, this name wasn’t as easy to decipher. I could only make out something like Deb Magussa or something like that. However, it yielded no results.wp_ss_20150420_0008But with the help of loving Twitter friends, I found out that it was a painting by Deb Magelssen.

After confirming that she for a fact isn’t Leonid Afremov, nor a smart catfish, it really became too entertaining. I took to Twitter to share the news with friends and after asking whether or not I should badger her for more of “her” art (and everyone agreed) then I went back to text my dear catfish wp_ss_20150420_0009After she told me she’s “not good at portrayed (?)” and that “drawings r easier” I asked her for a drawing of hers and she sent me thiswp_ss_20150420_0011After telling me how “good it is to be appreciates” I went back to zooming in again to find out which artist she was this time aroundV__2652I couldn’t figure out the artist nor his/her name, but again, the ever so wonderful Twitterfolk helped me out and once again, “her” art was discoveredCDFZ2ftUIAAnhTSAfter solidifying that she wasn’t the owner of that either, I went back to being the morally upright person I was and told her the truthwp_ss_20150420_0012I needed to know what inspires her to make such beautiful creations. Her state of mind and stuff yunno. So she told me this wp_ss_20150420_0013She has to Feel something, envision some image to represent that emotion and just go.
Yeah, just go.
Straight to hell.

Anyways, I baited her for one more paintingwp_ss_20150420_0014She took her sweet time before replying me. I was already worried she might not share “her” art with me yunno. But she replied wp_ss_20150420_0015I definitely knew it was gonna be good since she’s never shown anyone those paintings before. Most definitely not a lie yunno. So she showed me thiswp_ss_20150420_0016Definitely dark. I knew for a fact that I couldn’t see the name, so I just zoomed in and asked the Twitterverse to help me out CDFmb6LUIAAjgIvIt wasn’t long until the original painter was found as well wp_ss_20150420_0018I was told the name of the painting by a friend. The name of the artist is Katie Raff.

Anyways, it was time to end this. It was kinda already obvious that the result was going to be the same regardless of what was gonna be said. So I decided to ask her a simple questionwp_ss_20150420_0019I knew she wasn’t going to reply me anyways, so I just finished the whole texts with thiswp_ss_20150420_0020And yeah, that’s basically how I almost got catfished again.

Honestly, I was so entertained yesterday. Quite sad too, cus this girl looks like a babe and a half. But oh well, life goes on.

Anyways, follow @TheOiz and @AboutUseful and have an awesome day!

1 Comment

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  1. That shit is fucking amazing. She seriously thought she would get away with it? What a special kind of stupid she must be! I truly wonder what goes on in the head of someone like that.

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