Well hello thurrrrrr! I’m in an absolutely outstanding mood today simply because someone sent me an early birthday present (although now that I think about it, it means I’m not getting anything on my birthday Oh well) and I love the present soooo much 😀
Anyways, for today and for the next few posts, we’re gonna be talking about cartoons and using things we learned from Sexuality 101 into play (If you haven’t read it, this is the post btw https://usefulinformationaboutnothing.wordpress.com/2012/09/23/sexuality-101/)
So the first cartoon on the list is one of the old timers, and one of my favorite cartoons. A cartoon based on a time where there were no iPhones, and other new gadgets and what not. A cartoon which made me believe things were actually like that, and that people used pterodactyls with boxes attached to their heads where people can stand, to fly, where birds typed our messages for us in stone, and a time where you had to carry your car up and run for a while before letting the stone tires move. Yes, I’m sure you’ve guessed it.. I’m talking about, The Flintstones!!
This cartoon was, and still is, a cool cartoon. It made me believe in a lot of things and how cool it would have been in the olden days. Then one thing hit me right in the head. The cold hard truth. In The Flintstones, there was no black person, so I would have been out of place there 😐 That’s just the first thing I noticed. That didn’t stop the cartoon from being awesome though. For a long time, I believed that dinosaurs were used for domestic work like vacuuming, and showers, and also for other types of work like bridges, construction work, flight, etc. LOL, I was an illiterate back then. Reminds me of the time my mum made me kill a chicken after my brothers lied that they were too lazy to do so. After killing the chicken that day, I remember praying to God to forgive me for committing murder and I didn’t speak to my brothers or mum that day. Sigh, the days of innocence :’)
Anyways, back to the topic. Lets now analyze all the facts we’ve learned from The Flintstones. The first and most obvious fact about The Flintstones is that they’re either racists, or they just didn’t believe the black man existed in the olden days! That’s just on the side note. Let’s look at some other sides of The Flintstones like the name of the place they live in, Bedrock. Bed… Rock…. 😉 Thank God Young Money and Lloyd have helped us elaborate how sexual the word “Bedrock” can be 🙂
That’s just the beginning. Then look at the names of the main characters, and their kids. Fred “Flintstone” and “Barney” “Rubble”. The two best friends. Look at the names highlighted. Flintstone, Rubble, and Barney. Flintstone is just another way of calling the sedimentary rock Flint. Now, lemme give you the first line of what Wikipedia defined “Flint” as. “Flint is a hard, sedimentary cryptocrystalline form of the mineral quartz..” Just evade all the big grammar and look at the word “Hard”. Definition of Rubble? “Rubble is broken stone..” Highlighted words are “Broken Stone” And now finally, Barney. From the educational program Barney (the one with the purple “dinosaur”), we can see that apart from teaching the children stuff, Barney also liked to touch the kids and play around with them 🙂
Now, with all these, we can come to a simple theory, which would probably explain why they have such names and probably why there isn’t a black man in The Flintstones. Fred Flintstone is a guy who likes to form hard bad guy (which is why he occasionally bullies Barney) but in bed, he’s really soft (which probably explains why the wife of such a “hard” guy, Wilma, named their child “Pebbles” which means small stones. Probably cus Fred is just a big softie). Barney on the other hand, must have gotten experience from Barney (the purple dinosaur) with touching people and must have used his vex from Fred’s occasional bullying (which probably explains why he’s a broken stone) to do his wife hard and I’m guessing this is why they named their child, BAM BAM. Even the name has power in it. BAM BAM. All in all, Barney is just a softie on the outside who sometimes gets bullied by Fred and takes out his anger on his wife Betty (who probably doesn’t like it) while in bed hence the strong child they made. Fred on the other hand, talks big, but in bed, is another story (which Wilma probably doesn’t like and this is why she tends to bully him and make the rules in the house) hence the name Pebbles. This also explains why Betty and Wilma like gossiping a lot after their husbands leave for work. Now I’m guessing the reason why there isn’t a black man in Bedrock, might just be so because, as THEY (I dunno who they are) say, black men have large…equipments 😉 If there was a black man in Bedrock and he did one female, she’d probably tell the others and the word would spread till all the white folk heard about his “Massive size” and how “Dominant” he is. In simpler terms, Freddie and Barney would lose their wives if that black dude got a hold of both of em 🙂
Well well well, I hope I didn’t take too much of your time and I hope I’ve made this cartoon a lot more interesting for you to look at! Besides, I’m sure you noticed something odd about it anyways! Well, have fun and follow @TheOiz and remember to have an awesome day!